“Composer Artisan” ISFP. Socially and economically libertarian for reasons having nothing to do with Ayn Rand. Current fields of study:Playboy, A Course in Miracles, building a new life in Humboldt County.
Hollywood, California, is my spiritual hometown. I actually grew up in three other communities in California, but it hardly seems to matter which three. How could my heart take root anywhere under the tyranny of American public schooling?
I don’t have to work for a living. After my father died in December 1997, my family and I won a legal settlement.
The Blog About
Nothing: Sudheer of Hyderabad, India, is a big fan of Playboy and an
even bigger fan of Seinfeld. In this blog, he composes humorous
dialogues for the show’s characters.
Hit & Run: the official
blog of my other favorite magazine, Reason: Free Minds and Free
Markets; winner
of the 2005 Weblog Award for Best Group Blog; “the best
libertarian blog” according to the October 2005 issue of
Playboy.
Scoobie Davis Online: a self-described “filmmaker, surfer, and party crasher” in southern California. He’s also a Playboy fan, a left-leaning political gadfly, and a connoisseur of Jack T. Chick religious tracts.
The Search for
Health in Decadence: poetry and philosophical writings of Will, who has
engaged me in lengthy, good-natured debate through comments on my
blog.
The Blank Slate: The Modern Denial of Human Nature by Steven
Pinker. With stylistic flair, a Harvard cognitive scientist
refutes myths about human nature underlying a multitude of political
beliefs—including many of those that would either favor or
oppose the sexual revolution.
God in Popular Culture by Andrew M. Greeley. A liberal Catholic
priest sees quasi-Christian messages of grace abounding in the
allegedly soulless realm of commercial pop culture. For all I know,
Greeley is not necessarily a Playboy fan. But his
interpretation of Madonna’s song “Like a Virgin” has
influenced my impression of Playboy. (In case anyone wonders, my religious heritage is Lutheran on my father’s side and secularist on my mother’s.)
Folks, if you don’t find it hilarious to shout “Plop!” at the end of this Tammy Wynette/Naomi Watts/Peter Jackson fan video by YouTuber Peter Warkentin, you have a heart of stone. (But I’m not totally unsentimental. I admit my eyes misted during WALL-E.)
Benjamin Franklin, to name at least one. In 1745, he wrote this letter:
To my dear Friend:
I know of no Medicine fit to diminish the violent Natural Inclinations you mention; and if I did, I think I should not communicate it to you. Marriage is the proper remedy. It is the most natural state of Man, and therefore the State in which you are most likely to find solid Happiness. Your Reasons against entering into it at Present appear to me not well founded. The circumstantial Advantages you have in View by postponing it, are not only uncertain, but they are small in comparison with that of the Thing itself, the being married and settled. It is the Man and Woman united that makes the compleat human being. Separate, she wants his Force of Body and Strength of Reason; he, her softness, Sensibility, and acute Discernment. Together they are more likely to succeed in the World. A single Man has not nearly the Value he would have in the State of Union. He is an incomplete Animal. He resembles the odd Half of a Pair of scissars. If you get a prudent, healthy Wife, your Industry in your Profession, with her good Economy, will be a Fortune sufficient.
But if you will not take this Counsel and persist in thinking a Commerce with the Sex inevitable, then I repeat my former Advice, that in all your Amours you should prefer old Women to young ones. You call this a Paradox and demand my Reasons. They are these:
1. Because they have more Knowledge of the World, and their Minds are better stor’d with Observations, their Conversation is more improving, and more lastingly agreeable.
2. Because when Women cease to be handsome they study to be good. To maintain their Influence over Men, they supply the Diminution of Beauty by an Augmentation of Utility. They learn to do a thousand Services small & great, and are the most tender and useful of Friends when you are sick. Thus they continue amiable. And hence there is hardly such a Thing to be found as an old Woman who is not a good Woman.
3. Because there is no Hazard of Children, which irregularly produc’d may be attended with much Inconvenience.
4. Because through more Experience they are more prudent and discreet in conducting an Intrigue to prevent Suspicion. The Commerce with them is therefore safer with regard to your Reputation. And with regard to theirs, if the Affair should happen to be known, considerate People might be rather inclined to excuse an old Woman, who would kindly take Care of a young Man, form his Manners by her good Counsels, and prevent his ruining his Health & fortune among mercenary Prostitutes.
5. Because in every Animal that walks upright the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part. The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: so that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the girdle, it is impossible of two Women to tell an old one from a young one. And as in the Dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of Corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior; every Knack being, by Practice, capable of Improvement.
6. Because the Sin is less. The debauching a Virgin may be her Ruin, and make her for Life unhappy.
7. Because the Compunction is less. The having made a young girl miserable may give you frequent bitter Reflection; none of which can attend the making an old Woman happy.
8th and lastly. They are so grateful!!!
Thus much for my Paradox. But still I advise you to marry directly; being sincerely
Your Affectionate Friend, Benjamin Franklin
I like to think that Franklin’s buddy found himself the colonial equivalent of Shirley Jones as the unforgettable silver fox in Grandma’s Boy (photo credit: MTV.com).
Charlie Brown of the overrated comic strip Peanuts is a pussy, not an antihero. Every time Lucy Van Pelt moves the football out of the way before he can kick it, I want to say to her what Palpatine says to nine-year-old Anakin at the end of The Phantom Menace: “We will watch your career with great interest.” In the spirit of admiration, not resentment, of female strength, let’s watch some giantess videos.
YouTuber Jesper611 admits he didn’t make this video, but we can all thank him for uploading “Annah Grows”:
Dude, Where’s My Car? ends with Miss October 1999–turned–2000 Playmate of the Year Jodi Ann Paterson as a giantess. Unfortunately, the music video of this scene to “I Feel the Earth Move” by Carole King has disappeared from YouTube, so I’ll make do with the scene straight from the movie (thanks, Megagrey):
Ysabella Brave is a smart enough performer to understand the relationship between silliness and sexiness. True to her name, she takes rather bold risks in this arena that pay off marvelously. I’ve never seen anything quite like this next video in all my research on the history of pinups, cheesecake, exotic dance, and glamour (the song is one of her own):
As a senior editor of Reason, Howley (pictured above) deserves better than the leering she gets from us libertarian horn dogs. But since it’s easier to get forgiveness than permission, I’ll go ahead and be part of the problem. She’s yummy! Fellas who wonder about her voice, her mannerisms, and her mind can sample them at Bloggingheads.tv. They won’t be disappointed.
Speaking of yummy, Reason associate editor Katherine Mangu-Ward (above) holds the alluring promise of culinary adventure for those with politically incorrect appetites. A couple of years ago, she read a passing reference to antelope steak in an O. Henry short story, she tells us:
Why are there no antelope steaks at my supermarket?, I wondered. An innocent beginning to an obsession.
Bird watchers keep a life list of every species they have ever spotted. My life list is of species I have consumed. Both hobbies have the same root: It’s the impulse of a born collector who doesn’t like to have stuff lying around. All that remains is the memory of a flavor, wrapped—as taste memories always are—in the sights, sounds, and smells of the meal, the company, and the conversation.
Since that fateful day, I’ve nibbled on caribou filet, alligator jambalaya, elk medallions, yak dumplings, buffalo burgers, crocodile stir fry, ostrich burgers, emu jerky, and kangaroo loin. These memorable meals have all been interspersed with the merely interesting—frogs, ducks, rabbits, turtles, and deer—and the downright domesticated—cow, pig, and lamb.
I’ve had more than my fair share of eel, as well. Most of it was barbequed [sic] at sushi bars, though once I tried ordering it in a dim Russian restaurant in Boston. (They were fresh out of eel that night. Go figure.)
True to her magazine’s libertarian mission, she calls her hobby, among other things, “an exercise in enjoying the most notable fruits of globalization.” Her article ends with two recipes: kangaroo with fig sauce, and Tibetan momo (yak meat dumplings). Boy, oh, boy. What guy can resist the simultaneous charm assault on the brain, the heart, and the stomach?
Last but not least, Shikha Dalmia, a senior analyst at the Reason Foundation, deserves a place of honor here. Besides her beauty, I admire her excellent taste in stand-up comedians. Hot damn, any of these three ladies would be loads of fun on a date!
Am I just a Shallow Hal for noticing that Dallas public-affairs specialist Jennah Durant is beautiful as well as intelligent? I was looking forward to the two-day champion’s third game on Tuesday, February 5. Unfortunately, my local TV station aired coverage of the presidential primaries instead. Damn! You can’t tell from the headshot, but she has a lovely physique. (In her third game, she lost the championship by finishing second to Babatope Ogunmola.)
I believe my conscience is clear. I notice that Jeopardy! contestants of both sexes vary in their degree of physical attractiveness. Hopefully, the ones who aren’t blessed with beauty to match their intellect have learned how to love themselves anyway. As long as I show good taste in never making snide remarks about those contestants, I think I’m being mature and fair.
Jeopardy! is the closest thing I have to a sport. On January 31 of this year, I took an online test at Jeopardy.com in hopes of getting on the show. On an earlier occasion, I made it to a call-back audition in San Francisco, but no further. Wish me luck!
As devotees of free minds and free markets, we spend our nights pining for a major-party politician who not only looks dreamy while reading a Teleprompter but shows some passion for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness and sex, drugs, and rock ’n’ roll.
“Why are Russian women so hot?” asks Radley Balko at my source for the above photo of beautiful Maria Sharapova, the libertarian blog Hit & Run. To answer his own question, Balko approvingly cites Anne Applebaum of Slate, who credits the collapse of communism and the opening of markets in the former Soviet Union.
As a libertarian, I’ve been falsely accused of admiring Ayn Rand. Her novels reportedly have some kinky sex in them, but even so, I haven’t been motivated to read them after reading her March 1964 Playboy Interview (complete transcript; paid subscription required). Her assertion that “man does not possess any instincts” and her belief in “Objectivism” as a viewpoint structurally incapable of turning into fanatical dogma tell me that her view of human nature isn’t refined enough to merit serious study. As an alternative, I recommend a careful reading of the libertarian implications of Steven Pinker’s The Blank Slate: The Modern Denial of Human Nature.
I don’t necessarily speak of libertarian literature in general, but Reason has been sexing up its act for a while. More power to it, I say. Playboy and Reason are two magazines that can benefit mutually from a willingness to resemble each other a bit from time to time.
At Hit & Run, Radley Balko reports that the Federal CommunicationsCommunist Commission has fined ABC $1.43 million for showing an “indecent” episode of NYPD Blue five years ago.
Be sure to consult your physician before viewing this YouTube of the offending portion of the show, in which a woman’s bare buttocks are clearly visible:
FCC indecency investigations begin when the agency receives a viewer or listener complaint about a program and can drag on for months or years. The lightly staffed FCC enforcement bureau must go up against broadcasters, which have more legal and financial resources to battle the proposed fine and have a vested interest in dragging out the proceeding. After the enforcement bureau makes a finding, it must be voted on by the FCC’s five commissioners, who were occupied with cable television and wireless spectrum issues through much of 2007.
Never mind that the FCC is violating ABC’s First Amendment rights under a crypto-Marxist rationale of “public ownership of the airwaves.” Never mind that the government is acting on behalf of a tiny number of Church Ladies to punish a television network for placing adult content in a characteristically adult—and very popular—evening drama. Never mind that the authority of the FCC to impose the fine at all depends shamelessly on a time zone technicality (only ABC affiliates in the Central and Mountain zones are being fined, because that’s where the show ran at 9 p.m. instead of 10). In spite of all this, the public-morality bureaucrats are the underdogs in this fight.
Defenders of the FCC policy seem to fear that, some Saturday morning, TV networks might suddenly replace kids’ cartoons with pornography if they weren’t threatened with fines for indecency. On this particular issue, conservative culture warriors resemble the left-wing Adbusters crowd with their talk of amoral corporate greed. But networks have no more economic incentive to make stupid programming choices than a supermarket does to put wasabi in my milk.
If you’re as pissed tinkled off as I am about the FCC, don’t miss this unforgettable song from Family Guy. (I thank local friend Matt for encouraging me to link to the song here.)
Addendum, January 31, 2008, 9:32 a.m.: Since I’ve placed this post in the “Non-Playboy Hotties” category—and since the scene was obviously shot without a body double—I feel negligent if I don’t mention the name of the actress, Charlotte Ross.
Miss December 2007, Sasckya Porto, already has very devoted fans, and rightfully so. But she’s not my favorite this year.
Miss February, Heather Rene Smith, is local, which is always cool. When I lived in Ventura County, California, then-homegirl Lisa Matthews made the front page of the approving Ventura County Star-Free Press by becoming the 1991 Playmate of the Year.
I genuinely respect the tattoo of that very word in front of Jayde Nicole’s ovaries (January). It suggests to me a gracefully self-confident sexuality, a deep respect for beauty without a need to conform.
Playboy shows good taste in not airbrushing away the beautiful birthmarks of Miss April, Giuliana Marino. Wabi-sabi!
My favorite word for attractive large breasts is voluptuous. For attractive small ones, like those of Miss August, Tamara Sky, it’s dainty.
Howard Stern is a true pioneer in the medium of radio. After Jillian Grace (March 2005), Miss May, Shannon James, is the second woman to become Playmate with Stern as an important booster, if I recall correctly—something of a pioneer in her own right.
Miss July, Tiffany Selby, looks great in cowgirl style. What guy doesn’t appreciate a cowgirl?
Only 18 as I write, October’s Spencer Scott is the youngest new Playmate of 2007. Women do not necessarily lose their charm as they age. Tippi Hedren was remarkably easy on the eye as a guest on a TV talk show the other day. Still, men generally agree that youthfulness in women has a distinct sparkle—except, of course, for those men preoccupied by youthfulness in men.
Patrice Hollis, Miss September, reminds me that African-American beauty has been well represented on the centerfold over the years. Haitian-Italian Daphnee Duplaix (July 1997) did a commercial for Long John Silver’s a few years ago. She was dressed modestly, and she had grown her hair out to hang freely in sweet little black curls. All she did was gaze into the camera and talk about temptation. It’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen on family-friendly broadcast television.
But Miss June, Brittany Binger, is my personal favorite this year. Her face and body are so elegantly proportioned that, when she stands on a California beach, holding shells over her bare breasts in mock modesty, the curves on the shells and the curves on the woman seem to harmonize, like consonant notes on a musical scale. Connoisseurs will avoid crude puns on “the music of the spheres” to describe this: the breasts in question are refreshingly unspherical.
Botticelli got it wrong. Venus is a born brunette.
When I learned that Tina Fey would be the capital-I Interviewee of the January 2008 Playboy, I smiled, remembering the Internet gossip I had traded with some guys a few years ago about how great a Fey pictorial would be. Her face will reportedly be naked, anyway—although I happen to agree with Charles Taylor of Salon[free archive; no paid subscription necessary] that spectacles can be beautiful on a woman.
The ratio of women to men in the Playboy Interview has been low. But the ethnic, professional, and political diversity of the Interview’s female subjects looks pretty good in comparison to that of its male subjects. If you see any errors or omissions in my list of women in the Playboy Interview, please let me know. I want it to be complete. I’ve provided Wikipedia links for only those names from outside the worlds of show business and sports. (Judgment call: for my purposes here today, literature and predominantly written journalism are outside of show business.)
If Playboy wants to capital-I Interview any more women in 2008, I nominate Judith Rich Harris, scientist and author of The Nurture Assumption and No Two Alike. Many political discussions need her wisdom desperately.
April 1963 — Helen Gurley Brown March 1964 — Ayn Rand October 1965 — Madalyn Murray (O’Hair) January 1966 — Princess Grace of Monaco (i.e. Grace Kelly) May 1968 — Virginia E. Johnson (with William Masters) January 1970 — Raquel Welch April 1970 — Mary Calderone July 1970 — Joan Baez January 1971 — Mae West January 1972 — Germaine Greer September 1972 — Bernadette Devlin (McAliskey) April 1974 — Jane Fonda (with Tom Hayden) March 1975 — Billie Jean King September 1975 — Erica Jong October 1975 — Cher June 1976 — Sara Jane Moore July 1976 — Lily Tomlin May 1977 — Anne Beatts, Jane Curtin, Laraine Newman, Gilda Radner, Rosie Shuster (with the cast of Saturday Night Live) October 1977 — Barbra Streisand May 1978 — Anita Bryant October 1978 — Dolly Parton May 1979 — Wendy Carlos (formerly Walter Carlos) November 1979 — Virginia E. Johnson (again, with William Masters) April 1980 — Linda Ronstadt January 1981 — Yoko Ono (with John Lennon) May 1981 — Elisabeth Kübler-Ross November 1981 — Oriana Fallaci March 1982 — Patricia Hearst July 1982 — Bette Davis December 1982 — Julie Andrews (with Blake Edwards) October 1983 — Barbara Bosson, Veronica Hamel, Betty Thomas (with the cast of Hill Street Blues) April 1984 — Joan Collins September 1984 — Shirley MacLaine December 1984 — Linda McCartney (with Paul McCartney) January 1985 — Goldie Hawn March 1985 — Diane Sawyer (with the cast of 60 Minutes) January 1986 — Dr. Ruth Westheimer March 1986 — Sally Field May 1986 — Kathleen Turner November 1986 — Joan Rivers June 1987 — Whoopi Goldberg August 1987 — Imelda Marcos (with Ferdinand Marcos) December 1988 — Cher (again) May 1989 — Susan Sarandon December 1989 — Candice Bergen June 1990 — Polly Draper, Mel Harris, Melanie Mayron, Patricia Wettig (with the cast of Thirtysomething) November 1990 — Leona Helmsley February 1992 — Liz Smith September 1992 — Betty Friedan October 1992 — Sister Souljah December 1992 — Sharon Stone March 1993 — Anne Rice June 1993 — Roseanne Arnold (with Tom Arnold) November 1993 — Joyce Carol Oates May 1995 — Camille Paglia June 1995 — Joycelyn Elders September 1995 — Cindy Crawford January 1997 — Whoopi Goldberg (again) September 2000 — Jennifer Lopez December 2000 — Drew Barrymore October 2001 — Allison Janney, Janel Moloney (with the cast of The West Wing) January 2003 — Halle Berry July 2003 — Lisa Marie Presley February 2005 — Nicole Kidman November 2006 — Arianna Huffington December 2006 — The Dixie Chicks January 2008 — Tina Fey
I’ll admit that this is species lookism on my part, but don’t judge me before viewing the CNN video. Beavis and Butt-head never jumped the proverbial shark by turning nice, and even they would have said, “Awww.”
Hypothetical date of a lifetime (in a good way) Katherine Mangu-Ward will eat anything—except for these cuties.
In related news, an endangered wild rabbit of Florida, Sylvilagus palustris hefneri, was named after you-know-who.
Does Thanksgiving force you to endure the company of a bunch of bozo relatives? I can feel your anger. It makes you stronger. Everyone who wastes your time during this extended weekend is now an enemy of the Republic. Do what must be done, Lord/Lady (SINISTER WORD). Ignore your next of kin without mercy. Watch these online videos instead of talking to them.
Pink Five is not to be underestimated. Like the illegal Mexican immigrants who become a feature film crew in Bowfinger, she appears politically incorrect at first but turns out rather elegantly empowered.
Update, October 2, 2008, 1:13 p.m.: The new video embeds of Pink Five’s host, Atom Films, start automatically when you load the web page. Since visitors to my blog deserve better than the noise pollution of all four of her films playing at once, I replaced the embeds with a poster JPG link.
No major “Bollywood” production from India’s feature film industry will be freeze-framed in Playboy’s annual “Sex in Cinema” pictorial for some time yet. Only a few years ago have the gorgeous male and female leads in these elaborate song-and-dance melodramas been allowed to kiss on screen for the first time since the nation’s independence (60 years ago tomorrow). But I still think that the 2001 blockbuster Lagaan: Once Upon a Time in India could be a hit at one of Hugh Hefner’s movie parties.
Bollywood style is sometimes said to parallel the musical extravaganzas of American cinema of the 1930s, part of the cultural environment of Hefner’s childhood. The music itself sounds vastly different, but anyone who can learn to enjoy the Beatles’ tribute to Indian music from Sgt. Pepper’s can love the crowd-pleasing tunes of the best of Bollywood. Lagaan takes place in a remote district of British-occupied India in 1893. Indian farmers are threatened with hunger because of drought and the lagaan (Hindi for land tax) they have to pay every year: a portion of their harvest to the British government. Naturally, Indian audiences love to hate the smug, vicious colonial racism of the tax-collecting villain, Captain Russell. Audiences from every country on earth will cheerfully boo and hiss along. The farmers notice that the game the Englishmen call cricket looks like a “boys’ game” native to India. Out of desperation, they goad Russell into betting the lagaan on the outcome of a cricket match between the Indians and the Englishmen. If the Indians lose, they pay triple. If they win, they pay nothing for three years.
This is not only an engaging sports movie but also a romance with remarkable sex appeal. Pay attention to the subtitles in the video clip below. Surely, the song’s Hindi lyrics describe part of the eternal game of human mating all over the world. Only a little grounding in Hinduism is needed: The occasion is the religious festival of the god Krishna’s birthday. In his reckless youth, Krishna is said to have had many pretty young cowherdesses, Gopis, as playmates. But the main goddess in his life is his consort, Radha. The rest will sound all too familiar.
2001 Playmate of the Year Brande Roderick is the leading lady in the recent Bollywood production Out of Control. But I can’t lie. Lagaan is a much better movie.
Extra-credit question: How much would you pay to see a Mel Brooks tribute to Bollywood?
As a kind of disciple of a kind of rabbit totem, I’m especially delighted to share this satire with you:
I reported on Jessica Alba back in ye olden days of March 2006. Before that, I had explained why a relatively small market for male nudity is not prima facie evidence of patriarchal oppression. Hugh Hefner has since formally apologized to Alba. I don’t believe he was morally obligated to do that. But it may have shown class, nonetheless.
Researching this post today, I’ve rediscovered leftist feminist blogger Amanda Marcotte’s complicated relationship to reality. But that’s a subject for a future post.
Update, July 23, 2007, 9:38 a.m.: Better late than never, I credit Rabbit Bites with creating the video and Salon.com’s Video Dog for making me aware of it.
If you already know who all four of those people are, come to Sacramento immediately. You and I will have a blast.
Sally Satel, a psychiatrist and right-wing pundit, is the woman on the right in this photograph from May 9 showing part of a panel debate on the subject of free markets in human organs:
Kerry Howley, a senior editor of Reason, the political magazine that’s almost always right about everything, speaks into the microphone. I give thanks for the picture to Reason’s blog, where libertarian gentlemen find themselves continually addled by Howley’s multilayered charms.
Judge for yourself the parallels between that picture and this one from April 1957:
Italian movie star Sophia Loren can’t help noticing the plunging neckline of February 1955 Playmate Jayne Mansfield. (June 29 was the 40th anniversary of Mansfield’s death in a car accident at 34. Contrary to the morbid rumor, she was not decapitated.) I admit it’s juvenile, and maybe a bit sexist, to wish to imagine Satel having an attitude towards Howley similar to Loren’s towards Mansfield. But at least it’s a good launching point for wondering out loud about Howley’s attitude towards her inevitable role, perhaps ambiguous in its rewards, as an intellectual sex symbol.
How does an ambitious and talented political journalist feel about having to go through life so dark Irish whatever*, with such a silky voice? (In this NPR audio clip, she speaks second.) Is she flattered, embarrassed, annoyed, or some combination of the three by the kind of attention those traits get? Sorry, folks, but I wouldn’t ask so nosily and creepily if I didn’t love women so much. I’m just doing my thing for this particular lifetime, like Arjuna in the Bhagavad Gita. (If Hindu literature scares you, just rent The Legend of Bagger Vance. Matt Damon more or less plays Arjuna in it.)
*August 9, 2007, 3:05 p.m.: What can I say for my audacious guess except that everyone’s a little bit racist? (Everyone’s a little bit prudish, too, by the way.) In an excellent article for Reason, she volunteers only this on the subject: “I am ambiguously ethnic, in turns thought to be Asian or Italian.”
Now, if only landspeeder liberals like Queen Amidala didn’t support the taxation of trade routes to outlying star systems—and the overreaching government that makes new taxes necessary—the cross-dressing catfish of the Trade Federation couldn’t have been so easily manipulated by Darth Sidious. If some sentient beings display greed, it’s more realistic to try to make greed work for as many people as possible, as libertarianism does, than to give secular sermons on the sin of avarice, as the left does.
Besides being female, the Grinchette is a clever variation on Mr. Grinch. Just as the Leader has a big brain to challenge the Incredible Hulk’s big muscles, the Grinchette has a tiny brain to rival her male counterpart’s tiny heart. You know her better as Connecticut lawmaker Toni Boucher, whom a friend of mine, budding journalist Jennifer Abel, has made a fool of by letting her go around in circles with her argument that people who use marijuana medically deserve prison. I wish the Savage She-Hulk would kick the Grinchette’s ass. Hubba hubba!
Update, 12:36 p.m.: Jenny McCarthy, whom the Wikipedia page on She-Hulk mentions as hulking out in a TV comedy sketch, is the 1994 Playmate of the Year. Six degrees of separation, huh? Watch it on YouTube.
In her “20 Questions” interview for the February Playboy, Bettie Page, Miss January 1955, gives a mostly negative review of the 2005 film version of her life. But actress Gretchen Mol, director and co-writer Mary Harron, and co-writer Guinevere Turner interpret the pinup legend as a woman of remarkable courage and dignity. By refusing to take a side in any “culture war,” they avoid condescension towards the recent past. American sexuality in the 1950s is recognized as the first cousin of American sexuality in the 2000s: painfully aware of its own cruelty, yet managing to find some degree of grace. The religious implications of the word grace fit, because Page’s spirituality is taken as seriously as her sexuality. More people should view American social history through a lens so finely cut.
Sure, ’tis nothing at all like the morn in spring. (Finish the song parody yourself.) “Pornography may lead to masturbation much as a novel or film may lead to tears or laughter,” says the Feminists for Free Expression website. Of course, FFE intends this analogy as part of a political defense of pornography. But I’ve found another, ahem, use for it: to help understand the economics (and aesthetics) of pornography.
I don’t have the background in economics to answer the question of journalist Brian Doherty and economist Tyler Cowen, “Why is there (still) a market for porn?,” in the language of that discipline. But I’ll point out that porn doesn’t fuel masturbation in the exact sense that gasoline fuels a car. Comedies, tearjerkers, romantic narratives, and dirty pictures earn fans by having socially complex but agreeable effects on consumers’ nervous systems. (Remember that all solitary behavior has social implications, because all secrets are fragile.)
If economists still can’t rid their heads of the admittedly hilarious image of millions of Glenn Quagmires beating off surreptitiously in their bachelor pads, I invite them to replace that image with the implied, off-screen female masturbation scene about 35 minutes into I Wanna Hold Your Hand, an underappreciated 1978 farce that does for the psychology of fandom what Dr. Strangelove does for the psychology of war. In a moment of solitude and moral weakness, Nancy Allen’s character falls under the spell of the Beatles’ early romantic narratives.
There now, isn’t that image more fascinating economically?
I regard the Barenaked Ladies as the worst case of false advertising since The NeverEnding Story. But some of YouTube’s most celebrated talents have come together in this BNL lip-sync video that I must recommend anyway. Warning: It’s obviously an advertisement, so it might hypnotize you into buying BNL songs. Or something like that.
As a senior editor of Reason, Howley (pictured above) deserves better than the leering she gets from us libertarian horn dogs. But since it’s easier to get forgiveness than permission, I’ll go ahead and be part of the problem. She’s yummy! Fellas who wonder about her voice, her mannerisms, and her mind can sample them at Bloggingheads.tv. They won’t be disappointed.
Speaking of yummy, Reason associate editor Katherine Mangu-Ward (above) holds the alluring promise of culinary adventure for those with politically incorrect appetites. A couple of years ago, she read a passing reference to antelope steak in an O. Henry short story, she tells us:
Last but not least, Shikha Dalmia, a senior analyst at the Reason Foundation, deserves a place of honor here. Besides her beauty, I admire her excellent taste in stand-up comedians. Hot damn, any of these three ladies would be loads of fun on a date!
(Photo credit: Rod Dreher at Beliefnet.) Although I didn’t typically read Reason when she ran it from 1989 to 2000, it was sheer ingratitude for me to forget to include Virginia Postrel in this post. She wrote one of the “Intellectual Turn-Ons” in this blog’s sidebar, The Substance of Style: How the Rise of Aesthetic Value Is Remaking Commerce, Culture, and Consciousness. Libertarian women appear to be characterized by courage: Postrel not only discusses the politics of organ transplants in this Reason.tv video but actually does something about it for a friend in need. Wow!
Am I just a Shallow Hal for noticing that Dallas public-affairs specialist Jennah Durant is beautiful as well as intelligent? I was looking forward to the two-day champion’s third game on Tuesday, February 5. Unfortunately, my local TV station aired coverage of the presidential primaries instead. Damn! You can’t tell from the headshot, but she has a lovely physique. (In her third game, she lost the championship by finishing second to Babatope Ogunmola.)
If you like Shakespeare in Love, you’ll appreciate this variant on it.
Kerry Howley, a senior editor of Reason, the political magazine that’s almost always right about everything, speaks into the microphone. I give thanks for the picture to Reason’s blog, where libertarian gentlemen find themselves continually addled by Howley’s multilayered charms.
Italian movie star Sophia Loren can’t help noticing the plunging neckline of February 1955 Playmate Jayne Mansfield. (June 29 was the 40th anniversary of Mansfield’s death in a car accident at 34. Contrary to the morbid rumor, she was not decapitated.) I admit it’s juvenile, and maybe a bit sexist, to wish to imagine Satel having an attitude towards Howley similar to Loren’s towards Mansfield. But at least it’s a good launching point for wondering out loud about Howley’s attitude towards her inevitable role, perhaps ambiguous in its rewards, as an intellectual sex symbol.