Reflections on Playboy: Just in case I ever reincarnate as a woman...

October 17, 2009

Just in case I ever reincarnate as a woman...

...I feel a need to make some amends to improve this blog’s feminist karma before I retire from it. Four years ago today, I started it by posting “Please don’t assume I’m a pig.” In retrospect, I sometimes question that thesis.

For example, I have inappropriately sexualized the women of Reason magazine, especially Kerry Howley. I remember seeing an online video at Reason.tv of one of their editors’ meetings in which Howley looked rather uncomfortable in her own skin. It may be egocentric of me to suspect it was my fault, but I can’t help wondering. Oops.

I really did have a crush on YouTube star Brooke “Brookers” Brodack for a while. But even though I described some of her videos as sexy, I never sexualized her in my imagination the same way I’ve done with Playboy models. ’Nuff said. Actually, for all I know, my feminist karma may have gotten worse with that confession. Oh, the ambiguity!

On at least two points of predictable controversy, however, I’m ready to defend my feminist karma. As a group, women have disappointed me with their general unwillingness to defend equity in male and female reproductive choice. A Roe v. Wade for men is a moral necessity, no matter how many feminists hypocritically invoke nature’s will to force men to open their wallets to support unilaterally chosen children. Philosophically, I still believe in a woman’s choice to give birth or not, but I can’t be more than lukewarm in support of that cause until feminism learns to listen to men more sympathetically.

The other predictable controversy is that I’ve called my mother a cunt. I stand by what I said about that particular woman. MDMA has been teaching me the value of forgiveness, but not fast enough to forgive her (or my father) in time for this day of confession. I’m sorry, but I’m not sorry. She stood by idly while bullies and bureaucrats humiliated me at school and my know-it-all father fucked with my head at home. Just in case she ever reincarnates as a mother again, I hope she learns her lessons on how to avoid raising an ungrateful son.

Posted by Brian Sorgatz at 1:19 PM

♥ÐÅyÐяєÅмє®♥ left this comment at October 29, 2009 5:31 AM
boy !!! u do have a love for playboys... :)

and try forgiving without any reasons..it helps... :) and I can understand what u must have gone through..

just blog surfed and landed here...hope I m not intrusive

Brian Sorgatz left this comment at October 29, 2009 12:05 PM
No, you’re not being intrusive at all. If I didn’t want people to stop by and leave comments, I wouldn’t be blogging in the first place.

sweetromance2 left this comment at November 5, 2009 4:57 AM
I believe in equality between the sexes. I had the first two kids. Anymore and it's his turn to be pregnant.

sweetromance2 left this comment at November 5, 2009 5:00 AM
I believe in equality between the sexes. I had the first two kids, if he wants anymore, it's his turn.
:)

Brian Sorgatz left this comment at November 5, 2009 9:31 AM
Aah, here we go again. According to you, it’s Mother Nature’s will that men should be deprived of reproductive choice. Have you noticed that paternity suits are not a natural phenomenon in the first place? If so, how can you invoke the will of nature to justify them?

Anonymous left this comment at December 7, 2009 4:36 PM
Brian,

I hesitate to even put this out there, but I am curious about your view on my husband's opinion that I should be put in prison for choosing to have a child over his objections when I became accidentally pregnant.
Shantra

Brian Sorgatz left this comment at December 8, 2009 1:10 PM
Shantra,
I’m glad you asked. Being pro-choice for everybody, I cannot endorse your husband’s statement. However, I hope you can appreciate the reasons for his unhappiness about losing control of his reproductive destiny. Tragically, he will have to bite the bullet and not get exactly the desired outcome in this situation. No political or legal scheme can offer a painless solution here. Yet I must insist on the general principle that bilateral choices entail bilateral responsibilities, whereas unilateral choices entail unilateral responsibilities. Please don’t force him to help raise the child he didn’t want.

SHANTRA left this comment at December 8, 2009 5:39 PM
Sorry, but I will do whatever I can to offer my son the best life possible. I will be seeking support.

SHANTRA left this comment at December 8, 2009 5:42 PM
I need to point out that the choice to have sex was not unilateral. He engaged in consensual sex with his wife, whom he knew wanted to have children. At a minimum, he should have had a vasectomy if he did not want to father a child.

Brian Sorgatz left this comment at December 8, 2009 7:57 PM
“At a minimum, he should have had a vasectomy if he did not want to father a child.” In that case, why can’t a woman use the pill instead of having an abortion after the fact? To be blunt, I find you hypocritical on the issue of reproductive choice.

Yemanja left this comment at December 15, 2009 6:20 PM
Wow, very heavy stuff here! What ever happend to love and trust? If two people can not agree on what they both want TOGETHER, then they shouldn't be... Just a thought!... Kindly, Y

October 17, 2009

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