
HEF: Here, look at this. [offers worn photo of an unattractive woman]
TUCKER: Aww, gross!
HEF: That’s Gertrude von Brauer.
TUCKER: What’s wrong with her eye?
HEF: It’s dead.
TUCKER: Aww!
HEF: Gertrude was my next-door neighbor. Our childhood friendship blossomed into romance by high school.
TUCKER: Hef! No!
HEF: Tucker, yes. Gertrude von Brauer was the love of my life.
TUCKER: But she’s, like, the worst-looking person I have ever seen.
HEF: [Annoyed] Gimme back that photograph. Gertrude died when she was 18 years old.
TUCKER: Oh, thank God.
HEF: [Glaring] Tucker, the point I’m trying to make is that when you find that special someone in your life, you have to hold on to them.... There’s a Bunny deep down inside every woman.
TUCKER: They’re just not Bunnies you’d put in your magazine.
HEF: No, they’re not. But if you can see the Bunny in those girls, then you’re onto something, my friend.
Posted by Brian Sorgatz at 3:05 PM
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