Thanks to SiteMeter, I know that a woman in Belgium recently stumbled on a guest essay here by Googling insecure when my husband looks at other women (in English, without quotation marks). She might take heart from the miracle of May 14, when a troupe of fire dancers invaded a benefit party for the Marijuana Policy Project at the Playboy Mansion and upstaged the Playmates on their home turf. It can be done!
The number of millihelens a beautiful woman radiates is measurable by my dorkiness and spazziness in her presence.* I stood bravely in the front row of the audience with no regard for what could happen if they lost control of their flaming toys, thinking only of my duty as a scholar of the seductive power of the human female. Nor did I consider the dangers of looking like a desperate horn dog at an inopportune time. It was totally worth the risk to get close enough to notice the sexy bruise on one dancer’s thigh.
Comedian Joe Rogan served as our master of ceremonies. MPP executive director Rob Kampia presented an award to Bill Maher, who couldn’t be found at the party before or after that. DJ Pooh spun records, and Blues Traveler performed live. I followed a friend’s advice and got my picture taken with more Playmates than last year: this time around, with Julie McCullough, Deanna Brooks, Tiffany Taylor, Stacy Fuson, Miriam Gonzalez, Laurie Fetter, Amanda Paige, Christine Smith, Scarlett Keegan, Cassandra Lynn, and Alison Waite. Since I’m not willing to show my face on this blog, you’ll have to email me through the link on my Blogger profile page to see those photos. Off camera, I coaxed a kiss on my left cheek from Laurie Fetter and a kiss on my right from Deanna Brooks. It got even better when Brooks let me return the favor. Sincere apologies to Amanda Paige for pulling her hair while taking my left arm off of her shoulder.
Sadly, I missed my photo ops with a few of the Playmates there, including August 2004’s Pilar Lastra. But I can take pride in this candid, unauthorized, impulsive shot of her cottontailed derrière:
I wonder how she got that sawdust on her thigh. A better photographer would have patted it off before shooting.
Another blogger describes his experience at the same party—with photos—here.
*Inversely proportional to the square of the distance between the two bodies, of course.Labels: Mansi, OthBlo, Ph, PJ, PM
Posted by Brian Sorgatz at 7:36 PM
Shantra Harmony left this comment at June 28, 2007 9:27 PM
I assume your title here was a bit tongue-in-cheek, but I was not aware that everyday women needed hope ;-). In my experience, true sex appeal is based entirely on personality and charisma. Also, an interesting show will grab anybody's attention. BTW, one of my bro's friends, and now one of mine, used to refer to me as a "Bunny." I never knew for sure what that meant, but since he married a really cool woman he also calls a Bunny, it must have been a compliment. :)
Brian Sorgatz left this comment at June 29, 2007 10:30 AM
Shantra,
I keep hearing women complain about how “unattainable” the ideal of the centerfold is. At the risk of sounding glib or insensitive, I make an analogy between that and Salieri versus Mozart in Amadeus.
Once in a great while, a Playmate of the Month with proven writing ability is allowed to write her own article for the photo spread. Miss September 1988, Laura Richmond, sent Playboy a letter explaining that she had developed a conversational habit of saying “bunny” after various other words to describe people (e.g. “dumb bunny,” “fashion bunny”). After breaking up with her boyfriend, she called herself “no longer a love bunny but a Playboy bunny.” It became a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy. (But pedantic playboys know that, strictly speaking, a Playmate is a centerfold model while a Bunny is a Playboy Club waitress.)
Shantra Harmony left this comment at June 29, 2007 8:14 PM
Brian,
It's true that women complain about how unattainable the centerfold ideal is, but my question is, why is it such a big deal to try to attain it at all? If people could just be satisfied with their bodies, there would be no need for this kind of resentment. The idea of analogy of Salieri versus Mozart in Amadeus is interesting. I'll read your analogy later, but I guess it probably does sting a bit for some women. I remember Salieri crying in despair something to the effect of, "Why, God, do you give me the ability to appreciate great music but not the talent to create it?" In my view, this is a very damaging thought process, although quite common. But I ramble. Oh, and I had absolutely no clue about the distinction between a Playmate and a Bunny. Now I know.
"Jet" left this comment at June 30, 2007 7:55 AM
Brian,
I was just thinking about you the other day while watching Girls Next Door and was wondering if you went to the MPP event again.
I was a little off with my timing. I'd love to see the pictures from this year!
Brian Sorgatz left this comment at June 30, 2007 9:08 AM
I’ll send them right away, Miss Moneypenny.
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Shantra Harmony left this comment at June 28, 2007 9:27 PM